Often in life we overlook the facts that we consider little but still manage to affect our lives greatly. As children, infants in fact, we were made to believe in a force that is the 'Higher Calling', or god. We were not given a choice, nor were we asked our views, we were just conditioned to believe in god, it was an imposition of the beliefs of the elders of the family on us. The 'society' that we live in, a so called 'group of helpful people', managed to change the way we think and drove us to believe into not what's right, but into what they feel is right. I often think that society is just an elaborate conspiracy made by the kings of olden times to ensure that people stay pressed and there is no sign of equality whatsoever.
In our teen years, we think about and give way more importance to society than we should. Rather than forming our own identity, we try to blend in with what is 'cool' just so that we do not become a social outcast. We hide our talents, with the fear of being made fun of or bullied and losing the talent in the process. We make sure we look contended with life and happy on the outside, but die inside for the petty reason that we do not have faith in ourselves. We always have major insecurities about everything, from what we wear all the way to how we speak and think, just by the fear of being different, insecurities have never done anyone any good and never will because insecurities make us hide the talent that is bestowed upon us. Society affects us greatly without even us knowing it. We stop talking to amazing people just because society doesn't approve. We start hating people just for our friends so that our 'friends' don't hate us too. We fear being lonely in a society when we already feel alone even in a crowd. We fear not being accepted by others when we don't even accept ourselves. If we were meant to be like another person, then we wouldn't have different characteristics, if we were meant to follow someone, we would be a shadow, if we were meant to be accepted by everyone, we wouldn't be so lonely. I am not saying that society is bad and we shouldn't make a few tweaks in ourselves, all I'm saying is, the tweaks shouldn't change who we actually are. Insecurities and self-doubt are the major cause for the existence of bullies who make our insecurities worse to an unimaginable extent, which in turn turns our confidence into bit and pieces. Choosing the correct company is very important for teens because we all try to modify ourselves as to the wishes of others. We need to ask ourselves, how many of these friends will actually help us in time of need? How many of them will be with us forever? Are any of them worth modifying our behavior for? The answer is, no, simply because none of them will be there in the future. We making them a priority doesn't make us a priority for them, that is a big difference. We may change ourselves when they ask us to, but they definitely won't if we ask them. When school or college ends, they will all be lost in the crowd, what about us? We need to have a separate identity, shine on our own so we aren't hidden in someone's shadow. I strongly believe,"It's not bad to make friends, it's bad to make friends who pretend to provide us shade, but in actuality just want to cover us under their shadow, so our abilities are suppressed."Choose your friends widely, they determine your status, not your identity.
Unfortunately, we live in a society where misunderstandings are the root cause of broken friendships and relations and no one even wants to clear the misunderstandings. Once, they decide that a person is at fault, nothing can change that. I can't tell you how many friends I've lost thanks to misunderstandings but on the other hand, I'm glad that those people left because if they trust strangers more than me, if they are that judgmental, then it's better they left... I still feel sad about what could have become of our friendship that got shattered before our journey even started, the fact that those people actually mattered. The sad thing is that, people don't want things cleared out, their ego and judgmental nature doesn't allow them to, maybe that's why my regret is trusting them and not losing them..
“You will never reach your destination if you stop and throw stones at every dog that barks.” - Winston Churchill. I couldn't agree more. You should always be open to criticism but not so much that the criticism leads to self-doubt. If you sit and react to everyone who makes a comment upon you, you will never reach your destination, you'll be lost on the path itself.
One act of random kindness creates a ripple, if we try being the light for someone in their dark times or atleast lend them a hand, without expecting anything in return, we don't lose anything. I believe,"One should always play life like a gamble where you have nothing to lose, if you win it's great, if you don't it doesn't harm you either, that way you can never truly lose." If we help others, we might get helped too someday. If one person takes the initiative, he can make a difference, a big one if he is truly determined.
You know it's time to make new friends and find new company when your friends and society start influencing your identity. When the endeavor of 'fitting in' changes you and makes you bend your Morales, ethics, values and limits, when peer pressure overcomes it all and the life you live has merely your breaths but is lived by how others want it lived, you know you are wrong, not wrong because the society wanted you to change, but wrong because you did actually change. If a few issues can change your perspective on life, then you need to change the way you react to even the tiniest of details and problems.
Unfortunately, we live in a society where misunderstandings are the root cause of broken friendships and relations and no one even wants to clear the misunderstandings. Once, they decide that a person is at fault, nothing can change that. I can't tell you how many friends I've lost thanks to misunderstandings but on the other hand, I'm glad that those people left because if they trust strangers more than me, if they are that judgmental, then it's better they left... I still feel sad about what could have become of our friendship that got shattered before our journey even started, the fact that those people actually mattered. The sad thing is that, people don't want things cleared out, their ego and judgmental nature doesn't allow them to, maybe that's why my regret is trusting them and not losing them..
“You will never reach your destination if you stop and throw stones at every dog that barks.” - Winston Churchill. I couldn't agree more. You should always be open to criticism but not so much that the criticism leads to self-doubt. If you sit and react to everyone who makes a comment upon you, you will never reach your destination, you'll be lost on the path itself.
One act of random kindness creates a ripple, if we try being the light for someone in their dark times or atleast lend them a hand, without expecting anything in return, we don't lose anything. I believe,"One should always play life like a gamble where you have nothing to lose, if you win it's great, if you don't it doesn't harm you either, that way you can never truly lose." If we help others, we might get helped too someday. If one person takes the initiative, he can make a difference, a big one if he is truly determined.
You know it's time to make new friends and find new company when your friends and society start influencing your identity. When the endeavor of 'fitting in' changes you and makes you bend your Morales, ethics, values and limits, when peer pressure overcomes it all and the life you live has merely your breaths but is lived by how others want it lived, you know you are wrong, not wrong because the society wanted you to change, but wrong because you did actually change. If a few issues can change your perspective on life, then you need to change the way you react to even the tiniest of details and problems.
Society is meant to be helpful but the mere fact that some people like to show their power upon the weaker is what shakes my belief in the word 'equality'. It makes me wonder about being like the Shield of Achilles, fight so I don't have to fight again. The moment the weak get out of control, not only their talents, but also their life go down a black hole and never come back. It's true that society was is supposed to help us, but it's also true that unless we find ourselves being help-worthy, no one can do anything.
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